This is not Jerry Springer, this is my life

I was recently at a bar with a new friend and the topic of conversation turns to the redundant "what brings a young girl like yourself here to Florida." Instead of the usual, "I'm bored.", "I'm running from the law... etc", I told him a little about myself and my past. The bartender happened to overhear parts of the conversation and asks, "What are you talking about, Jerry Springer?" I laughed. I laughed long and I laughed hard. I realized that it had finally became funny. In fact, hysterical. "No, my friend. This is not Jerry Springer. This is my life."

I had dated the same guy my entire life. From around age 13 to age 23. I had reached a mature enough age to realize the relationship was unhealthy and it was time for us to part ways. I started partying a lot and spending time with friends and I met someone new. I was having a blast and not worrying about petty things anymore when what had started as a fun-filled relationship started to take a turn toward serious. The ex had also started seeing someone and I was happy for him because I had expected it and knew it was the best thing for him. What I did NOT expect was what was about to come.

It was late one evening and I was at the most dreaded place on earth (ISU campus) cramming for mid-term exams. I had gotten in a fight with boyfriend #2 and I was trying to call and text him. Anyone knows that it is impossible to concentrate on school work when you are extremely pissed off and I had no choice but to finish my projects that night.. so I did the only thing I thought I could do: I went to his house. Let me just stop right here. To any young, naive girl trying to contact her bf who is not answering his phone on purpose, DO NOT, I REPEAT, DO NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES, go to his house. I pull into the driveway prepared for the worst, although when I got there I realized I was in no way prepared for what I found. Yes, you got it. My ex bf's future fiancee IN BED with my new boyfriend. Shock, rage, terror, betrayal.. every emotion you can possibly think of began to overtake every inch of my body and I instantly kicked into fight or flight mode. PLAN A: Whorezilla left her keys and purse in her vehicle. Take off now without being noticed and dump them both in the nearest cornfield. PLAN B: stay and fight. If I could go back and do it all over again I definitely would go with PLAN A, but not being in any sane state of mind at the time brought me knocking on the door. After no answer, I decided they weren't getting off that easy. I set the panic alarm off on her vehicle, sat down indian style in the driveway, and waited. Although I wanted to rip them both to pieces I still had some dignity left and as she walked to her car my only remark was, "How do you sleep at night?"

The following afternoon I was on my way to my dad's house to give him my suicide note (joke) and I pass by the ex's house and there she is outside sweeping his porch. ARE YOU SERIOUS? If you're wondering, yes I text him and told him what had happened but he didn't believe me. She told him that she had just given boyfriend #2 a ride home from the bar. Oh she gave him a ride alright.