D is for Degree

Go big or go home. That’s what I’ve always said and I’m sticking to this concept especially when it comes to academia. If you do not have a big plan, large college fund, and lofty goals and dreams to pursue: stay home! Not only will you indebt yourself by being completely clueless you will damage your self-esteem and feel empty and inadequate when you never reach the goals you fabricated for the sole purpose of having goals. Because when it comes to colleges and futures it’s all about the goals! If you don’t have them you better get them! Just ask my high school guidance counselor whom I’m pretty sure I didn’t meet until the last week of my senior year... whose official title would be better suited as scheduler, considering the fact that I was never counseled on anything throughout my entire high school career or offered guidance on anything college related.

Make good grades. Earn scholarships. Apply to Big Ten schools. Decide on a major. Choose a career. I’ve got some goals for you. Shut the fuck up about your stupid fucking goals and teach me something I can use. Explain to me that college is hard and tiresome and that really it pretty much sucks. Remind me that it costs about a minimum of $10,000 per year and that this money is blown if not used in concordance with a decided degree that will be obtained within the standard four years. You should probably also throw in there that most colleges take beer pong as seriously as we do basketball here at CCHS so you better be prepared to show your school spirit and support this extracurricular activity weekly, despite the toll it may take on your grades and attendance.

You see, when it comes to college and deciding which one you should attend and the career path you should take, you are pretty much on your own. This is easy if you are goal-minded and know exactly what you want in life which I’m sure if you are one of these people you are not reading this post. As for me, it would have been great if someone had offered me some true guidance, and by guidance I mean what’s the easiest and fastest way I can cheat my way through this establishment so I can move on to the next rite of passage society has laid out for me.